Bazooka Joe Comics Spec Script

archive7

Bazooka Joe at His School Play Rehearsal: Extended Gum Rapper Proposal

Bazooka: Terricklae Endread! … Wait, that’s not the line. Cheroklee Entead! Hey, you! That’s my coat and stuff next to you… yeah the blue one — can you hand me my script?
Mort: (pause)
B: How’d you do that?
M: What do you mean?
B: How did you say that word and have the round brackets be around it?
M: Oh, that. That’s the thing — you don’t say anything. You just act it out.
B: (stunned)
M: Exactly.
B: (in Hebrew) I’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO BE IN MY OWN COMIC STRIP.
M:I don’t understand Hebrew, but I understood that what you said was in Hebrew.
B: Are you getting bugged by this colon always to the left of us? You just ran into it.
M: On stage, our words will be printed upon giant two-dimensional “speech bubbles.” So the colon is just a temporary thing.
B: I see, I see. When you say “on stage,” you mean, “in the comic strip?”
M: I like to consider ourselves performing a play — in sequential box form.
B: Uh-oh. Here comes the punchline.
M: This play about boxing is going to be great!
B: Yeah, if I can remember the punch line.

B: Also, who in the world calls me “B”? I didn’t go to all the trouble making sure everyone called me “Bazooka” so that people could shorten it to “B.” Sheesh.

W. David MARX (Marxy)
April 29, 2006

Marxy wrote a lot of essays back on his old site Néomarxisme. This is one of them.

6 Responses

  1. Momus Says:

    I’d recommend you edit out the bit in this script that says that Japan is in terminal decline and will never again reach its 90s peaks.

    Oh, I see you’ve already done it. Nice work!

  2. marxy Says:

    Oh hush.

  3. Lex Says:

    L: (chuckles at the bickering)

  4. Sho Says:

    9 to 5 wa, evil evil

  5. Mike Says:

    I always thought that the israeli bazooka joe strips were much funnier than the american ones. They always had a much stronger post modern undercurrent.

    also: “tamid ratziti lihiyot be komiks misheli”, in case you want to edit that in.

  6. marxy Says:

    I don’t think that anything could be less funny than the American ones. Years ago, my sister got me a Bazooka Joe ashtray in Israel. (I don’t smoke.)

    Thanks for the translation. Perhaps I will use that.