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Announcing the Winners of the First Annual Pavement Lyric Parody Awards


The field was strong this year, but we congratulate Amanda Green from Huntsville, Alabama on her First Prize-winning entry: “Two Steaks”

two steaks
we want two steaks
in our mouth
two, two steaks

forty million steak knives…

two steaks
we want two steaks
there’s no vultures
there’s no steak fries

forty million steak knives…

Honorable Mention to Greg Fox from Cincinati, Ohio for “De-Range’d Life”:

the stoned pimple pilots
they’re elegant bachelors
they’re foxy to me are they foxy to you?
i will agree they deserve absolutely nothing
nothing more than me

Marxy wrote a lot of essays back on his old site Néomarxisme. This is one of them.

19 Responses

  1. Rory P. Wavekrest Says:

    I don’t think Greg really gave that one his all.

  2. clarence Says:

    Who listens to Pavement for their lyrics anyway.


  3. dzima Says:

    Stephen Malkmus = dinosaur (and I didn’t even like him in his “prime”)

    Also, I’m not American but I can tell that you spelled Cincinnati wrong.

  4. channing Says:

    In the mouth a desert (because Marxy’s sense of humor is very dry)

  5. dzima Says:

    Does Marxy have a sense of humour? I didn’t know that.

  6. Momus Says:

    We’ve had the orthopraxy entry, the 90s grunge entry, but where’s the Kiiiiiii entry?

  7. dzima Says:

    where’s the Kiiiiiii entry?

    Apparently there were serious arguments over publishing rights and sponsorship payments regarding this issue: Marxy was demanding a fee rise to 20 yen for everytime someone visits the Kiiiii website coming from a Neomarxisme entry link. The girls thought it was much money and have called their lawyer to further discuss the problem.

  8. marxy Says:

    Can we vote Dzima off the island?

  9. marxybashing Says:

    1. I hate Pavement. (Marxy you are lame and have bad taste.)
    2. Marxy, you aren’t funny. (That’s why I have to constantly comment on your site: to tell you that you aren’t funny. You are also always wrong.)
    3. You repeat yourself too much. (And these new essays aren’t giving me enough ammunition to make you out as a bad guy.)
    4. I am hilarious. (That’s why I always have to comment. My hilarity should not be contained.)
    5. I’ll be back soon. (To leave three or four comments about the many ways you suck. Don’t come to my blog! You are not welcome!)
    6. This is so fun! (I’ve said too much.)

  10. alin Says:

    It looks like the debates on this blog are becoming orthopraxic.

  11. David Says:

    I didn’t even know there was a contest.

    I feel left out.

  12. marxy Says:

    David –

    Don’t fret. There is always next year.

    Here are some potential winning entries ready to be explored:

    “Cut Your Hare”
    “Sumer Babe” (about a talking pig in Mesopotamia.)
    “Rattled by Rush 2112”

  13. r. Says:

    >Can we vote Dzima off the island?

    In theory yes, but which island are you hoping to vote him off? The one he is on, or the one we are on?

    Two men enter, one man leave.

  14. marxy Says:

    I was being metaphorical about this crazy little island we call neomarxisme.

  15. Rory P. Wavekrest Says:

    “Sumer Babe” (about a talking pig in Mesopotamia.)

    That made me laugh.

  16. M. Says:

    What the hell happened to this blog? It used to be 90% interesting cultural comment, 10% lame entries like this one. Lately, the percentages have been reversed. Come on, Marxy, you can do better than this!

  17. Chris_B Says:

    even a slow news day post like this one gets 16 comments?

  18. Michael McCarthy Says:

    Was this about Pavement? I honestly didn’t know… the 90’s were probably the sumation of everything that wrong with a generation trying to combat everything that was wrong with rock & roll… people should look back on the 90s the way they do Flock of Seagul style haircuts, with disdain, and a bit of shame.

    That said— Marxy is employed now, so don’t expect his best writ to show up on his blog.

  19. marxy Says:

    What the hell happened to this blog? It used to be 90% interesting cultural comment, 10% lame entries like this one.

    This blog is now 90% lame entries that I want to write and 10% predictable entries that you all want to read. Maybe I should lower the subscription fee?